E-vangie Tales #90: Hollywood Babble-On, Part 1


(Parts 2 & 3 follow below)

What an opportunity!

I had the chance to meet with 70 other evangelists from around the world at Ray Comfort’s headquarters, Living Waters, and teach them the 10 Commandments in two minutes (I can teach you how to do it too). It was the Evangelism Boot Camp, a gathering of people who are actually doing the work, evangelizing together, and open-air preaching together. Today, we would all go down to Hollywood Blvd., and meet in front of Grauman’s Chinese Theatre.

I didn’t know it at the time, but this would be one of the scariest things I have ever done. I was kicked out of an establishment twice, and chased down a Hollywood block by some irritated Scientologist Security guards. Before we left for Tinseltown, my partner Ed Lee had a photo opp with Ray.
null We loaded up Ed’s SUV and headed to our destination. Before stopping in the hood for gasoline I took my million-dollar bill Gospel tracts out of my front shirt pocket. Because God gave me the gift of wisdom, I thought it unwise to flash wads of cash in the ghetto. Still, I handed them out to a few customers and also to the cashier who flashed me a big “Thank-you” smile.

We pulled off the freeway before heading to Grauman’s and stopped into Tommy’s. Have you ever eaten one of their greasy chili-burgers? They are awesome. The customers were very friendly too and appreciated our tracts. null

We made it! And the seventy evangelists were lined up all along Hollywood Blvd. Every hundred feet, someone was standing on a little stool, holding a portable sound system, and preaching to whoever would listen. Everyone was handing things out: Gospel tracts, band advertisements, sale leaflets, and invitations to take a bus ride to tour the stars’ homes. Minions from Tony Alamo Ministries held stacks of papers that blared the headline, “MASS SUICIDE.” Stay away from those guys; they’re weird even by Hollywood standards.

Costumed characters shilled for money as tourists inspected the handprints and footprints in the cement at Grauman’s. Mostly, people were curious about the unfamiliar names of people who had stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. Hey, there’s Shrek’s wife! Turns out she’s Catholic. Homer Simpson stood around looking dumb and had nothing to say for a change. I witnessed to this gay Charlie Chaplin. null He listened to my whole shpiel, then later asked me for the directions to my church. I can’t remember if I invited him to come as he was…

Click here for part 2!

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