Politically Correct Heaven/Hell Joke

While walking down the street one day a US senator is tragically hit by a truck and dies.

His soul arrives in Heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. “Welcome to Heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.”

“No problem, just let me in,” says the man.“Well, I’d like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven; then you can choose where to spend eternity.”

Pooper Peeper Praise!

My friend from Canada, Paul LaTour, imagines this scenario during church testimony time from a “Pooper Peeper tract” (see below) convert: Preacher: “Yes! YOU sir! The fellow in the red shirt sitting in the fourth pew. Please, stand up and share your testimony with all of us here starting with where you were when the