Here are some toasts from Ireland as compiled by The Bathroom Reader (a really funny book), to help you celebrate this special occasion with your sweety (leave that communion wine alone!). “May you have food and clothing, a soft pillow for your head; May you be forty years in Heaven, before the devil knows you’re
And here’s yet another reason why I must ask the million $ question everyday to people which is: “If you were to die today, would you go to Heaven or Hell? Do you have an “Appointment with Eternity” photo? Let me know.
Those of you who are sharing your faith verbally know that one of the questions we ask the unsaved is: “Have you ever told a lie?” Don’t just limit that question to pagans! A preacher finished the service one morning by saying, “Next Sunday, I am going to preach on the subject of liars. As
A man was walking home alone late one foggy night, when he hears:
BUMP…
BUMP…
BUMP…
behind him.
Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him—
BUMP…
BUMP…
BUMP…
Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him— faster…
faster…
BUMP..
BUMP…
BUMP.
He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him.
However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping
clappity-BUMP…
clappity-BUMP…
clappity-BUMP…
on his heels the terrified man runs.
Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.
With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door.
Bumping and clapping toward him.
The man screams and reaches for something, anything,
but all he can find is a bottle of cough syrup!
Desperate, he throws the cough syrup at the casket…
and…
2 Bad Atheist Jokes
What do you get when you cross an atheist with a Jehovah’s Witness? Someone who knocks at your door for no apparent reason. ***** The story is told of the Atheist who accosted a preacher… “Do you believe in eternal life?” The preacher has no time to reply. “Well its a load of rubbish!” shouted
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