A MODEST PROPOSAL FOR THE CHURCH IN 2016

A MODEST PROPOSAL FOR RELIEVING THE BURDEN OF GUILT OF THOSE WHO HAVE BEEN DISOBEDIENT TO CHRIST’S COMMAND TO GO INTO ALL THE WORLD AND PREACH THE GOSPEL.

It is a melancholy object to those who walk through this great town or travel throughout theworld parish country, when they see in the streets, the roads, the bars, the movie complexes, stadiums and parks, all the lost for whom there is no hope, nor glimmer of smile from the weary and heavy-laden.

I think that it is agreed by all parties that Western Christianity has forsaken its sacred obligation, nay privilege, of spreading good news to all those who are perishing, those following gods of their own making, accountable to no one except their creditors and even then, slacking.

Years have passed and false Gospel presentations have been erected allowing all sinners to just ask Jesus into their hearts without fear of God or repentance of sin; the fruit of these endeavors being a false hope and negligible security for entrance into Heaven, but a most certain assurance of damnation to the lake of fire.

This being the case I shall now, therefore, humbly propose my own thoughts, which I hope will not be liable to the least objection.

I have been assured by my many meditations on the subject, and know in my heart that what I will suggest is true, just and right. I know this because I feel it, and we know that feelings are the basis for all established matters of good doctrine and practice. I do then, meekly offer to Christian consideration this: All our good works have come to naught.

The fruit of Christian charity and love has borne a nation in shambles, evidenced by divorce, abortion, gay marriage, debt, violence, and general putrefaction. The reason is because we have forsaken our first duty: to seek and to save that which is lost. We have neglected the preaching of God’s Law, impending judgment and a fiery Hell as eternal punishment for all who would trust in their own good works for salvation. We’ve also neglected the truth that Jesus saves when trusted and repentance of sins performed. This leading to a general disregard of all things Godly and perpetrating complete unbridled callousness toward everything decent.

To remedy this catastrophic condition I propose a cessation of all good works to focus our attentions solely on preaching the Gospel only.

Guilt trip evangelism

To this end, we shall eliminate programs for the poor, the invalid, the shut-in, and the prisoner, with all excess monies put toward speaking the truth in love by the proclamation of the Gospel. Leave the beggar in the street, the Samaritan in the gutter; let the atheist and idolater own him.

Paid ministers, youth leaders—all church staff— shall get real jobs, salaries devoted only to those bellwethers who warn of sin, righteousness and the judgment to come.

Preaching in churches shall cease, pulpits destroyed, pews torn asunder, whereby parishioners shall be displaced, forced into the streets, only to share spiritual wisdom with the dead in spirit.

Cries of the alien, orphan, and of the stranger will be ignored, replaced by the adherent’s promise to shout loudly, proclaiming proudly, that all should come to repentance and belief in the Savior.

preach

This should continue till revival breaks forth, God is feared, Christ exalted and Christianity proven true.

I profess, in the sincerity of my heart, that I have not the least personal interest in endeavoring to promote this necessary work, having no other motive than the good of my country, my fellow man, and the furtherance of the Gospel.

Now read this tragic story from The Babylon Bee.

Comments (10)

  1. Ryk

    Reply

    Well I assume by lost you mean non Christians, as Christian is defined by you. If so then you are sadly mistaken about us lacking hope or smiles. My circle both socially and professionally is overwhelmingly atheistic, agnostic, or other forms of non religious. We are a happy, satisfied bunch with good lives, strong families and a great deal of hope for how we are going to build our future. This is particularly true of my young no believing friends and colleagues for whom religion is not a default or tradition but something silly and irrelevant. These teens and twenty something’s, far from being hopeless are pursuing career and education, investing, planning, being active in politics, charity, and community, they are the very vision of hope. I am proud that they see me as a mentor and confidant but really, in terms of atheism they don’t need me or any old atheist who still considers religion worthy of thought, they have transcended rejecting religion and have achieved indifference to it. Even the young people I know who identify with religion do not care about heaven or hell or salvation, they value the community and good works they feel religion provides. These young men and women are the future and it is a bright and hopeful one. If my activism, rhetoric, and outspoken atheism can help other young people find this path then my time is well spent.

    Now you could say we are hopeless in regards to your religions afterlife and salvation doctrine but why should we care, it is not real to us, there is no evidence in favor of it, it provides nothing we need in our lives. The whole idea of preaching to that we need Jesus and repentance to find salvation is meaningless since we know of nothing we need saving from. Preaching that we need the Gospel to have hope or purpose is meaningless because we know of nothing in the Gospel that is necessary for having hope and purpose, we are quite capable of finding those things for ourselves.

    In my experience the sad, hopeless people are the ones angry at their religion losing its influence, angry that the law is no longer enforcing religious rules, bitter at the decline of faith, railing against science and anything else they fear counters the tales told in their holy book.

    While I have no doubt there are angry bitter atheists out there, I have heard them and even met a few, they are not the norm. Most of us are happy, hopefull, caring people. We do not wish to belittle your faith or deny it to you, we simply do not wish to share it and are a bit bored and offended that people belittle us for not practicing it.
    I have no use for religion but many people I respect find it meaningful and I do not disparage them for it and I would fight and die to protect their freedom to practice it, provided they are not harming others. Obviously I would not consider religious freedom to extend to stoning gay people, bombing infidels, or sacrificing children to Satan but religious practices that do not harm ones fellow man should be inviolate, as should the freedom to not practice religion.
    At any rate when I hear someone imply that non Religion leads to despair and hopelessness I just shake my head and wonder if they actually know many non believers.

    • Reply

      Ryk,
      Do you understand the point and purpose of My Modest Proposal? And what I’m referencing in the title and who I am attempting to skewer?

      • Ryk

        Not exactly the only modest proposal I’m familiar with is by Jonathan Swift which isn’t relevant.

        I’m not sure if you were trying to skewer Christians who do good works without spreading the Gospel or evangelist like Ray Comfort who spread the gospel but do no good.
        If you would like to explain I’m very interested to hear it.

      • Ryk, thank you for your kind words. I was skewering non-evangelizing Christians. Perhaps the satire was not as pointed as I hoped!

  2. Ryk

    Reply

    As to leaving the poor and needy to the atheist, I rather endorse that proposition. Secular charity does quite well and does not attach conversion or religious indoctrination as a stipulation. Christian charity has always been a missionary act and in its absence the poor and needy particularly in the developing world would no longer be beholden to priest or proselytizer. The biggest problem I see with this proposal is not that secular charity would be unable to fill the gap, it is already doing so in many places, my fear is that Islam, and predatory cults would also rush to fill the void and an even more destructive ideology would be attached as a condition of being aided.

  3. Ryk

    Reply

    I am curious as to whether you were being serious or tongue in cheek. Nothing you said conflicts with an evangelical ideology but it does conflict with the principal of charity espoused by Christ in the Gospel. I do not criticize either way but am certainly interested in the answer.

  4. Ryk

    Reply

    As to your writing style, eloquence, composition and rhetoric, I applaud you, it was excellent.

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