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You might be a fundy atheist if… #8

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(Read the first 7 collections starting here.)

45. You contend that no war in history has ever been created by non-belief. Yet, when you are told that 176 million people lost their lives in wars during the last century, created by non-believers like Stalin, Lenin, Mao and Hitler, to name only a few, you reply that those wars fought were fought in the name of ideology and not ‘atheism’ because atheists “don’t fly planes into buildings or start wars.”

46.You accept (and quote back to Christians) any number of works that say Jesus wasn’t the Son of God and call them “honest”, “thought-provoking”, and “scholarly” proof, even when they completely contradict each other and come to completely different conclusions.

47. You believe that when our forefathers were framing the Constitution, they were staunch deists; but when they were beating their slaves, they were Bible-believing Christians.

48. You think that the Declaration of Independence is unconstitutional because it mentions “The Creator”.

49. On that basis, you think that the Declaration of Independence is therefore void and the United States should return to British rule.

50. When it is returned to British rule, you plan to go straight to London and tell those Brits that having the Anglican church as a state church violates the constitutional separation of church and state.

More to come at a later date!

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  1. With regard to number 45, first, Hitler was not an atheist. He was a quite devout Christian by all available accounts. And if you look at the way Lenin, Stalin, and Mao actually led, they supplanted the gods of the previous empires with themselves as gods. Why else display Lenin’s body in Red Square or have the giant posters of Stalin and Mao?

    More importantly, I should point out, that if Lenin and Stalin were truly pushing atheism, you’d think that Christianity wouldn’t have enjoyed such a rapid resurgence in post-Soviet Russia/Belarus/Moldova/Ukraine or that Islam wouldn’t have enjoyed such an equally rapid resurgence in Azerbaijan, Turkmenistan, Tajikistan, Uzbekistan, or Kazakstan…

    For 46, I’m trying to find some kind of concrete proof that Jesus actually existed. It’s awfully convenient to have him ascend to heaven corporeally, thereby taking away any physical proof of his existence.

    Number 47. There was no uniformity among the founding fathers. Washington, Adams, and Jefferson, however, were deists.

    Numbers 48, 49, and 50 are just silly. I know exactly who my “creator” is. About thirty seven years ago, my mom and my dad got naked, had a good time, and I came around nine months later. Nothing religious about it and it ties in directly to the declaration of independence, although I can’t be certain as to whether or not my mom cried out the name of some fictitious deity in the heat of the moment.

    And how, exactly, could a document written thirteen years before the constitution be anything but unconstitutional?

    As far as number 50 is concerned, it does raise the question of how a country that has no established religion is being held hostage by religious extremists, while one that does have an official state-sanctioned religion is much more rational in its nature.

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