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E-vangie Tales #76: THE DEMON SECTION

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There she was: a rather well dressed black woman thumbing through a Wicca book at Barnes and Noble. I thought it might be too dangerous to interrupt this lady from her satanic curiosity and engage her with the gospel at this time. Still, I chose to throw all caution to the wind…

“Excuse me,” I said politely as I handed her a gospel tract, “Did you get one of these million-dollar bills?”

Smoke billowed from her temples as she glowered at me with blood-shot eyes, then licked her venomous lips with a serpent tongue before hissing, “What issssssssss it you want you little scumbag?”

I was taken aback. I couldn’t believe what was happening.

I couldn’t believe this was happening because it didn’t happen. Actually, she was very nice, looked up from her book and took the million-dollars from me very gently. And then she graciously said thank-you.

“May I ask you the million-dollar question? If you were to die today would you go to heaven or hell?”

“Heaven,” she answered.

“Why is that?”

“Because I am saved by the blood of Jesus; He’s my Savior.”

“Uhh, great,” I stammered. I was at a complete loss for words and stumbled away shaking my head. I thought about this a moment and felt that I had let this poor, confused—obviously back-slidden—woman off way too easy. How in the world could a real born-again, saved-by-grace, Bible-believing-Christian-lady call Jesus her Savior and be studying witchcraft? And why was she in the New-Age-demon section of all places anyway? I had to confront this misguided person right now; someone had to set her straight and that someone was I. Didn’t Jesus seek and save that which was lost?

“Uh, excuse me,” I interrupted again. “You said that you are a Christian, yet here you are in the witch section. How can that be?”

She winked, looked both ways, and said in a conspiratorial whisper, “I’m on a mission.”

Yeah, I’ll bet. She’s probably putting hexes on all the people that visit the Christian Romance section. “What kind of mission?” I asked.

“See these?” She chuckled to herself as she showed me her little white business cards. “I’m putting these in all the books and I’m praying for all the people that read them.”

The cards read: John 3:3- “In reply Jesus declared, ‘I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again.’”

God sure uses nutty people.

7 Comments

  1. That was the best one yet. Really funny. Good thing you are so humble…HAH!

  2. This one was really great Steve! Did this really happen to you? You should get a publishing deal, man. I really find these tales encouraging.

    Happy Passover!
    Ziv

  3. They are all true! Find me a publisher and you can get a %! Steve

  4. I do believe it, having run into similar situations: we need to always be humble and non-judgmental! I knew a man in Ireland who was studying in England to become a priest: in fact, his overseer put him on the fast track to priesthood (which seems odd since this guy and some other of his friends were rocking the Vatican boat because they understood that Jesus should have preeminence, not Mary). I asked him why if he felt that way, he was becoming a priest and in essence, he described himself as a double agent who wanted to infiltrate Catholicism to its core and try to bring about changes. Lost contact with him after he became a priest and often wonder how the double agent faired?! I guess he was going about this the only way he knew how and prayed for God’s wisdom to lead and guide him.

  5. This is from Mike Herrera:

    Steve,

    I have handed out tracts and witnessed to people during rush hour traffic because of a captive audience but inserting tracts in occult books, well that beats all! Why couldn’t I have thought of that!

    MH

  6. Yeah, I suppose that we could all take a lesson from her—actually two.

    There are all kinds of unique ways to introduce people to Jesus, AND you

    can’t tell a book by its cover(?). That last one is not original with me…

  7. Love this blog. Very good and God does use nutty people to spread the Gospel in unique ways.

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